A Dom's Life

Tears

2008-07-13T22:25:00.000-07:00

I like tears. Not tears of sadness, and not tears of joy. Not My own tears for sure, and not the tears of strangers either. I like the tears the come from putting My girl under duress. Physical, emotional and psychological duress...

I pulled out My instruments of torture and set them on the bed. One by one, I picked up the items and showed them to her. I teased her and scared her, trying to decide what I would use on her that night. Would it be the misery stick she hates so much? Maybe the clover clamps that cause way to much pain? Would it be the butt plug up her tight virgin ass? That makes her cry and beg for mercy quicker than anyting I have found so far. Maybe I would just spank her barehanded or viciously slap her face and call her names?

But what about the belt that hangs on the headboard of the bed? Its been so long... I suddenly wanted nothing else but to put that belt across her ass over and over. I needed to swat her with it. I got hard thinking about beating her with it. bringing it down over and over on her ass, thighs and back. Yes, I had decided... it would be the belt. I would indulge Myself completely at her expense.

I set the other toys aside and told her she would be getting belted. I set her hitachi near and instructed her to roll over. I yanked her shorts and panties off, exposing her bare ass. she turned away and buried her head in a pillow. Its what she does, its how she braces herself for her impending doom. I folded the belt and got it ready for swatting and then leaned over her and told her " beg Me to spank you with the belt". she hesitated so I again told her "beg Me to spank you". she whispered something I couldnt hear, so I grabbed her hard by the hair and yanked her head up putting her face near mine.

"Beg Me to fucking spank you with this belt NOW slut", I demanded.

"Please spank me with the belt Daddy", she finally answered, her voice already starting to quiver.

I pushed her head back down into the pillow and let her hair fall down and cover her face. " Well, I was gonna spare you the belt tonite but since you insist on it... I guess I will". So I started belting her. Not as hard as usual, but hard enough. I didnt let up, I didnt pause, just over and over I brought it down. I heard her gasping. I told her to get her hitachi and put in on her pussy. she told Me that she couldnt it wouldnt reach (the hitachi plugs in at the foot of the bed). So I instructed her to roll on her side and it would reach. she, with an exasparated tone told Me " That wont work"

Bad move, I pulled the vibe away from her and told her "never fucking mind, its not like I care... it doesnt make the spanking any better" So I resumed spanking her but this time the belt was being fueled with anger. she started crying almost imediately after I resumed the beating.

I kept at it hard for a few more minutes until she was crying loudly and uncontrollably. I then threw down the belt and told her to roll over. I got on top of her, in between her legs, and fucked her as tears streamed down her cheeks and her mascara ran. I stroked her wet pussy deep and hard until I was ready to let go, then I pulled out and shot my cum all over her.

A Short Story

2008-06-21T08:02:00.001-07:00

I have a short story to tell. I was driving to work early yesterday morning when I got a text from My girl. It said "you are going to kill me, I cant find my earrings." her earrings are her collar. she must wear one or both of them all the time when she goes out in public. So now I am heading to work thinking up punishment, wondering how many misery stick swats she could take without passing out, when she calls Me. she said "I found them, you know where they were at?", "no", "they were in My ears and I have been looking for 40 minutes, I am going to be late for work"

I laughed because it was kinda funny, but its also D/s romantic, and this is why... she is so used to wearing My earrings she forgot she had them on. But even more importantly, she panicked and looked for 40minutes. she would rather look for 40min and be late for work than risk My disappointment. she was dreading my displeasure and fearing her punishment.

What was 40 minutes of frustration for her, was a display of complete devotion to Me.

Birthday and Collar

2008-05-02T16:17:00.000-07:00

I just wanted to catch up on the goings on the past few days. First, we celebrated My girls birthday. I think it was a good one for her. she spent it with people she loves and she got some good gifts.

Second, one of her gifts was a collar. We didnt and dont consider a collar worn as "necessary" for her to belong to Me, but I wanted her to wear one as a constant reminder to both of us that she does indeed belong to Me. The problem has been subtlety. A month or so ago I came up with the idea of an earring as a discreet collar. she agreed that an earring would work. So I got her a nice set of earrings as a collar. she must always wear at least one. I am debating an extra earhole just for her collar ring higher up on her ear. It would be easier to conceal under her hair, and maybe more comfortable. Additionally, I think it would be a more significant gesture if it was its own piercing. Regardless of ear location, the fact that she now wears My collar is extremely pleasing to Me and I am sure to her. It makes Me happy when I see it.

Third, I am feeling better. Still healing but not as miserable as I have been. Feeling good enough to Dom scheme. I have something planned for tonite. Its really devious. I am quite proud of it. I cant tell or it would ruin it but I am sure you will hear about it after the fact.

Tell Me How Dominant You Are

2008-04-27T21:19:00.000-07:00

I was talking to My girl last nite, sitting across from her in a chair, I dont know what we were talking about, I just dont quite remember. This is what I do remember her saying and this is what made Me react. she said, "I am a pretty dominant person". I flipped out a little bit ok maybe alot. The Dom hammer got dropped. It wasnt as knee jerk as it sounds, there was a fuse lit earlier. Let Me explain.

Earlier that day I was talking on the phone with My girl and this is what I heard for the first time that day, "I am a dominant person." It just rubs Me wrong to hear My /s talk about being dominant. so sue Me. I stewed on it for a little bit that day. It rubbed Me wrong not because I want My girl to be sub to everyone or anyone else but Me for that matter and not because I want her to be a dishrag or somehow weak. I love that she is smart, and capable. It rubbed Me wrong because I want her to be proud of being My /s. I want her to identify as My /s, not the worlds dom. My girls submission to Me is something I need her to embrace completely. she should not only take satisfaction in being sub to Me but she should take pride in it. I dont want her to think of herself as a dominant person to everyone but Me. I want her to think of herself as a submissive person only to Me. she is identifying wrong. her submission to Me isnt the exception... its the rule.

So the first time she said it that day it did make Me think. When combined with other clues like her reluctance to call Me Daddy or Sir outside the bedroom it is starting to feel more like she is embarrassed on some level by her submission to Me. I am feeling resistance where there should be none. So when I heard the phrase "I am dominant" for the second time that day without having heard even one Daddy or Sir all day, well I couldnt let it slide. To Me, it was no coincendence that I heard that phrase twice in one day. I took it as her "pushing back", so I had to make a point...

I stopped the conversation and told her to get on the floor on her hands and knees. she looked at Me a little panicked and asked why? I just repeated it to her. she looked at Me and she knew I was displeased and it scared her so she hesitated again. I told her a third time to get on her hands and knees on the floor and she said ok and finally did as I instructed. When she was on her hands and knees in front of Me I told her "tell Me again how dominant you are".

To Me she is the beautiful girl on her hands and knees in front of Me looking up willing to do anything to please Me. To Me she is submissive, she is My girl and I want her to take pride in it. There is no more important or difficult undertaking in her life than her submission to Me and I want her to be proud of her submission and proud of who she is.

she is not the worlds dom... she is My sub that is allowed to dom the world.

More Daddys and Sirs

2008-04-24T17:47:00.000-07:00

I want to hear it more. I want to be called Daddy, I want to be called Sir. I like hearing it. I find it pleasing. I dont expect to hear them in most company but there is no excuse why she cant use my titles when we are alone, or on the phone or in text. I dont mind the occasional other endearment but it starting to feel like she is not quite comfortable calling Me Daddy or calling Me Sir. she needs to get accustomed to addressing Me how I wish to be addressed. I dont think she is intentionally disobeying, I just think she is a little uncomfortable with it. That will go away through repetition. I just hope for her sake its the repetition of use and not the repetition of My belt landing on her ass, legs and back.

Fucking Back

2008-04-21T17:07:00.000-07:00

Ok I am HORNY. Seriously, I am super horny. Its been about 3 weeks for Me because of My recent medical mishap. I dont think I have ever gone this long without release. It is absolutely true that the wind blowing just right will get Me hard... ok just the thought of wind blowing does it. Ok just the word "blow" is enough to give me a thrill. So anyhow, I have been having some pretty vivid sex dreams that are now spilling over into daytime fantasy.

This was the dream I woke up from yesterday morning. I was on top of My girl. I had her legs up on My shoulders and I was fucking her as deep and as hard as I could. she started fucking Me back. My girl will do this and it really turns Me on not just because it feels good but because the effort is overtly sexual. I see her as being very slutty for Me when she does this. By fucking back, I mean she will do things to buck her hips. fucking back doggie would be her keeping her ass up and pushing back a little as I push in. she has a few ways of fucking back when I am on top. If her legs are down she will put a foot down and lift and lower her ass off the bed/ground. Well in My dream I had her legs on My shoulders. Fucking back from this position entails her straighting her legs as much as she can and then relaxing them. this lifts her hips and lowers them back down. I really do enjoy the effort. Oops a little bit of a tangent, so back to dream...

I was on top of her with her legs up on My shoulders and she started fucking back even though I was fucking her as hard as I could. I started berrating her and calling her a nasty slut for fucking back when she was taking it so hard. I began to fuck her even harder trying to get her to freeze in pain, trying to get her to stop fucking back. Whether she slowed down stopped or continued, I would slap her across the face hard call her more names and tell her what whore she was for working so hard to please Me. I kept pounding and pounding her like that all nite in My dream.

The thing about this dream is that its a situation that has actually happened more than once. I do like to go on a tirade and humiliate her when I am hurting her and fucking her hard and she is working so hard to increase My enjoyment. The fact that this scene has come back to haunt Me in a dream at My horniest means I REALLY like this moment.

I guess if I pull it apart some I can kinda figure out what turns Me on so much about it. In the midst of using her hard for My enjoyment not regarding her pleasure or even comfort in the meantime she tries to give Me even more pleasure by fucking back. I further objectify and use her by humiliating her for the effort. Very sadistic of Me I know. I then start slapping her face which I know she finds deeply humiliating and tell her to keep trying to fuck Me back. I make her feel like a total slut for Me for trying... more humiliation. Then I fuck her harder and harder to try and get her to stop and if she does I chastise her for stopping. Wow I am even hornier now!

Where We Have Been.

2008-04-19T18:17:00.000-07:00

So its My fault that My girl and I have been M.I.A. from the blogs this month. I have had a semi surprising and completely miserable medical issue come up. I am not going into details but to say not life threatening just really uncomfortable to the point of torturous at time over the past few weeks. I am on the mend from the trauma and gearing up to cope with some long term issues. There have been a few positives to come out of the mess of this month. The biggest positive has been how much closer together I feel it has brought Me and My girl.

I dont know exactly what I want to say... I am still sorting thru some thoughts but I feel closer to her now than I ever have before. she has been My angel. I was exposed and vulnerable and in need. she without question was there for Me in everyway.

When My strength faultered she kneeled so that I could lean on her. When I needed to find a reason, she was there with a smile and her big blue doll eyes to remind Me how good life can be. When I thought it couldnt get any worse she made Me think it wasnt so bad.

I feel as though I have shown her alot of My "weak spots" as a person lately and then the medical thing from hell happened and she saw Me maybe at My most vulnerable. I know now she accepts Me completely as her Daddy, and as her love. her feelings toward Me, and her submission to Me have not wavered but rather have only become deeper and stronger.

Pony Tails

2008-03-03T20:28:00.001-08:00

My girl has been wearing her hair in pony tails alot for Me lately. she knows it pleases Me. I dont ask much of her dress code and presentation wise. My girl knows how to dress and I love her hair no matter how she wears it. she knows I like it up (the vamp in Me likes to see the neck) but I dont require this of her. I like to see all that hair down sometimes too. Variety is the spice of life after all.

But WOW I love the tails. I find them crazy cute and a pervy turn on and My girls effort to be pleasing in this way to Me has not gone unnoticed.

Ask Me First

2008-03-03T19:58:00.000-08:00

I expressed to My girl that from now on I want her to ask permission for any activities she plans or intends on attending. We had this conversation before but I have never really been adamant on the subject. So from now on I dont want hear her say "I am going with so and so to here on this day" rather I want to hear her ask "Daddy is it ok if I go with so and so to here on this day?" Easy enough and totally submissive.

I desire this of her for a few reasons. Its a reminder of her submission to Me. her time is mine and I will ultimately decide how its used. Its also an exercise in trust. My girl needs to trust in the decisions I make for us and for her, she needs to trust that although I totally control her I am not totally controlling. And finally by asking permission, she will always know for sure that I know about and am not displeased with where she is planning on going or what she is planning on doing. No worries and no surprises that way.

Control

2008-02-07T14:24:00.000-08:00

So My girl failed to reach "0" on My new task; the "countdown". her blog has all the details. Essentially, she is given a number at the first of the month and thats how many times she must makeherself cum when not in my presence. she picks the number and then I change it as I like. I added some in january. Part of the task is also reporting to me as soon as she can that she made herself cum for Me and give Me details. I like the details.

I knew it wouldnt be easy. I knew she would have to be at least occasionally inappropiate to make it to zero. We do spend alot of time together so some would have to happen at work or some other semi public place. That is what I wanted. I am evil that way. I want to know she is somewhere touching herself for Me, working hard to make herself cum for Me. I want her to know she is being completely inappropiate but has no choice because she must obey and please Me. I want her to tell Me all about what she did for Me. I was very disappointed when she missed hitting zero.

There are some circumstances to this month that made it tougher to make it to zero but that doesnt mean she shouldnt have done what she had to do to please Me. her orgasms are for Me. she cums at My pleasure. Those orgasms were not hers to ignore but rather they were mine to enjoy. So I have set out to make sure she understands this. I have instructed her to get herself close as often as she can thru out the day. I have set her feb countdown number to 0. I have made all her orgasms conditional. I am toying with her. Bouts of denial interspersed with random chances at an orgasm all the while forcing her to get close and deny herself over and over, is not only fun for Me but I hope its also lesson learned for her.

Some of My fav chances for her so far. walk into the room and ask her how long she thinks it would take for her to cum if she started now? "2 minutes really thats all?" then I said "go!". I saw it pass the 2 minute mark but I didnt stop her I wanted her to still try as hard as she could to cum as fast as she could. I wanted to hear the begging to cum. Then I said no. It was just short of 3 minutes. so close...

I was on top of her fucking her hard a few nights ago. I decided to give her a chance to cum. I leaned into her close to her face and asked her if she wanted a chance to cum? I got a very enthusiastic yes from My girl. So I told her I would say yes if she begged permission to cum within the next 10 strokes. I counted them out loud. she made it to 7 and started begging. I said yes cum hard for Me. I felt her and saw her and heard her obey Me.

I told her I would allow her to cum if she begged but only while I was spanking her. she got up on her knees and put her ass in the air like I like for spanking. I started spanking as she touched herself. everytime she got close I spanked harder. she finally managed to overcome the pain and beg to cum. I said yes and hand spanked her extremely hard as she came.

I have also decided she should be directly punished for disobeying and not completing her new task. she is to submit a list of 3 punishments and I will decide which one she gets. If I dont feel any are adequate well there is always the belt til My arm is sore from swinging I suppose

Pent Up Dom Energy

2008-01-26T18:18:00.000-08:00

My girl has been out of town for the past few days. she went on a weekend trip with her friends. I do miss her. she will be back tomorrow and I do plan on working out a lot of this pent up Dom energy! I will try to be gentle... ok not really but you know what I mean.

Will I tie up My girl tomorrow? Yes. Will it be spanking or hot candle wax burning? Havent decided yet. hmm maybe both. Will I make her beg Me to stop spanking and or burning her? Probably. Will I make her beg Me for permission to cum? Everytime. Will I make her beg for My cum? For sure and probably while slapping her and calling her My slut and My whore.

Do I want to see her at My feet looking up at Me adoringly? Of course. Do I want her curled in My lap or laying with her head on My chest, feeling completely safe and loved? Definately yes to both.

Do I want her submissive and obedient? Always

Why so Hard?

2008-01-17T16:52:00.000-08:00

After fucking My girl really hard this morning she asked "Does it feel better for you when you fuck Me that hard?" I answered some smart ass Dom thing like " Of course it feels better for Me, it hurt didnt it?" So I am hung. I told My girl early on that it would be her greatest source of pleasure and her greatest source of pain. I try to make good on that statement all the time.

This morning I had her long legs up on My shoulders and I was leaning forward over her head. Her hips turned up and her pussy was completely exposed at an angle I could go very very deep. I made it hurt. I am guilty as charged. My girl makes this face when I stroke her really deep. its a face I truly crave to see. At first, everytime I stroke deep her eyes open wide and she gets this look of surprise. With each successive stroke the surprise starts to fade even though her eyes still open wide. Each stroke makes her lips tremble more. The fading surprise begins to get replaced with a pleading. I like the pleading look. Is My girl pleading for Me to continue? or is she pleading for Me to ease up? My guess is a little of each but either way she has no control over it. I will use her as I desire.

So I like to make it hurt to make her endure, I like to make it hurt sometimes just to show how deep I can go and how painful I can make it. I guess, also, the darker part of Me occasionally fucks her so hard and deep because I want to ruin her from other men. I think in a way I am marking My territory.

Testing and Exercising

2008-01-17T15:38:00.000-08:00

I think I like to test control more than exercise control. I dont particularly like to micro-manage My girl (reserving right to micro-manage anytime I desire). Sure, I have things I care about, I have My rules, and the occasional random demand, but testing control I think is more rewarding.

Telling My girl what to wear everyday would be an exercise in control. I dont normally tell her what to wear (reserving the right to burn all clothing I dont find pleasing). Spanking My girl hard, on the other hand, is a test of control. I want to see what she will endure for Me. Endure is a big word for Me. I like to make My girl endure for My pleasure. Its easy to submit if you want to, so I enjoy making it difficult for My girl. The more she endures for Me the more submissive she is to Me. What would she be enduring by dressing in what I want her to wear everyday (with the possible exception of My bad taste)?

I often remind My girl that her body is Mine to do whatever I wish to do, whenever and wherever I desire. I make her tell Me the she will do anything for Me, she will do whatever I want. I do try to push the limits, when testing control. On the edge of the limits is where the most trust is required and displayed and where the most submission is elicited.
To Me, pushing the limits in exercising control would be intense micro-management. Everything from dressing, to setting schedule, deciding diet, when to bathe, when to talk and to whom, etc. I would guess the value in exercising control vs testing control, would be the small constant reminders of control. I dont want to push the limits in exercising control but still I think maybe I am being a little to lax in this area. Time to fix that!

Whats Behind Curtain One?

2008-01-09T10:36:00.000-08:00

Often I will create choices for My girl rather than just forbid or insist. Dont get Me wrong, I am so not above just forbiding or insisting and sometimes that is what is required. But, I also think that the presentation of a choice can occasionally be a good idea. Sometimes instead of saying "you cant do that to the thing with the thing on it ever!" I think its better to say "sure you can do that to thing with the thing on it, but if you do this will happen."

An example:

My girl likes to playfully swat or pinch Me sometimes. I could have just outright forbidden this behavior (on the grounds you dont hit the Dom!) and punish it if I needed to. Instead I chose to tell My girl, that she could playfully swat or pinch Me, but if she did so, I would immeadately stop what we were doing and return the favor at what I consider 2x as hard. I am not a good judge of what 2x harder feels like either and I always err on the side of much much harder. I think if you ask My girl 2x as hard is prob closer to 10x as hard but hey who is complaining right? So now she has the choice, she can be a brat and accept the known consequences if she is feeling brave or she can play it safe. Either way, I feel like I win.

Another example:

A few days ago, in the afternoon, I got My girl all worked up and close and begging permission to cum. I denied her permission and told her later that night if she was good, I would consider allowing it. That night I instructed her that she could either: 1. put the nipple clamps on herself for Me and give them a few good tugs (Very scary prospect for My girl) or 2. be denied permission to orgasm for an extended period of time. Choices, choices. She chose to inflict the pain of the clamps on herself for Me. Very pleasing.

So I think its about sometimes letting My girl know the punishment, ahead of time before I have to enforce it. This creates a situation where she either does what I want or essentially volunteers for the punishment. And really... who am I to refuse a volunteer? I also think choices can occasionally create a dilemma for My girl in trying to figure out "what does Daddy really want?". Forcing My girl to think about what most pleases Me is a dilemma I can live with.

Something I Enjoy

2008-01-04T17:11:00.000-08:00

Here is something I really enjoy. I like to have My girl cuddle up with her head in My lap just like a kitten. I know, I know, it sounds sappy but I really do like it. I see her as so submissive when she is curled up in My lap, and it gives Me a chance to make My girl feel completely safe and comfortable. I have been demanding more and more of the lap time lately and I dont see that changing.

Not Enough to Know It, I Want to See It

2007-12-31T16:02:00.000-08:00

Yesterday My girl was very pleasing to Me. The day before last was a good one too but in an indirect way, so lets start there. I leashed her. I spent an entire day with her, not observing what I considered a sign of submission or obedience. I felt the need to give her a real reminder of submission by displaying overtly My Domhood. I did this by teathering a rope to her wrist and holding the other end. I instructed her that if she felt the rope go tight she would need permission to be excused to go any further from Me. Very Dom of Me!

I tell her that I do "pull Dom punches" with her. I am inclined to be more Dom than I display with her. I take into account who she is at all times not just who I am. I dont think this is a fault of mine I think its an asset (yes, here comes the but), but its possible that I am not being overtly Dom enough to elicit the obvious signs of submission that I require. I feel like the D/ and I know I am accepted as the D/ but maybe I dont display it enough. Maybe I need to say "Very Dom of Me more often. Conversely she is feeling like the /s, knows she is the /s but doesnt display it enough either. The very Dom voice in My head says that nothing is required of Me other than to tell her what pleases Me, but the pragmatic voice in My head insists I can do things to make the task of pleasing Me easier.

I say that was a good day because, well My Domself really enjoyed the leashing exercise and more importantly she got the message, I want overt signs of submission as often as possible, it very much pleases Me. This leads Me to yesterday and what a good girl she was for Me.

she didnt miss a rule. she deferred to Me. she tended to My needs. she was a thrill and a joy for Me all day. I am very proud of her. I noticed real effort in displaying her submission and letting Me know I was her Daddy, and nothing pleases Me more. I also spanked and spanked her which I very much enjoy. My girl has a hard time with pain so for her to endure spanking for Me is a very obvious sign of submission and yes I like to make her ass red what can I say? guilty as charged. The spanking went on a very long time and she endured and endured and eventually orgasmed for Me as I was bringing My hand hard down on her ass over and over. I had told her that cumming was the only thing that would stop the spanking. Very Dom of Me again!

So it was two good days for two different reasons. On the first day we both learned it is not enough to know it, I want to see it. And on the second day I saw it and saw it and saw it. she is My good girl.

When Trouble Finds My girl

2007-12-31T14:20:00.000-08:00

I guess there are plenty of motivations, reasons, and inclinations that go into being a Dom, and I am certain these things shape the ways someone shows dominance. If I think about My own Domself and try to pull it apart and figure out the "whys" and "hows", well it just kinda gives Me a headache.

... Ok a took a few aspirin. So let me take a shot at this. First and foremost I see Myself as a protector. In a perfect world, I could absolutely keep her safe from all harm at all times. In a perfect world I would also have 1 bazzilion dollars, perfect health, be a little taller, have a little more hair and live in Bali. So I am forced to recognize there are probably going to be times I cant protect My girl. That just pisses Me off to no end but there it is. Just because I cant protect her from everything doesnt mean I dont want to protect her from everything. When I see harm come to My girl of any kind, I do feel like I failed her and work My best to ameliorate her suffering.

So I think part of being a good protector is not just preventing harm but also doing My best to ease the harm that occurs. I believe My girl has every right to expect Me to protect her from all harm but I also know she will have to occasionally be forced to accept My comfort instead.

Ouch, the headache is back! more on "whys" and "hows" later.

My girl is My girl

2007-12-28T16:55:00.001-08:00

I have never monitored My girls perv mail. I want her to know I trust her completely, which I sincerely do, and I have never had any other reason to do so other than mistrust. I do however encourage her to reply politely to perv mails as long as they are civil. she is My girl and her behavior and actions are a direct reflection of Me. Politeness is important to Me and luckily for My girl its important to her ( saved her some training and punishment no doubt!).

So a dom wrote My girl yesterday. I was present when she was going thru her email. his first mail was not horrible so she later that day responded politely with this:

"I am involved in a committed D/s relationship & I am not looking for a Dom, or additional training. I thank you for your interest in me & I wish you the best of luck in your search. Happy New Year".

this is what My girl got back:

"you are obviously new to this, so I will help you. Don't ever refer to a Dom in lower case, you did this on 3 occasions and that is worthy of severe punishment. Do not ever refer to yourself in upper case, you did this on 4 occasions, and that is a much more serious offense. In the future I suggest you follow proper protocol for a slave. If your dom is not teaching you these things, perhaps it is the wrong match. Email Me and I will suggest possible training for you. "

ok so the guy is a tool but beyond that it raises 2 issues I want to talk about. the first issue is "sub protocol". My girl is only My girl and as such the only proper protocol she need worry about is MY protocol. This guy has no idea what I expect of her and shouldnt be assuming he does. For all this guy knows or any other D/ for that matter I have instructed her to never cap other doms and always cap herself unless writing to Me or about Me. so again let Me say that My girls only submissive protocol is what I decide not anyone else. I think that is a sentiment all D/ can agree with. My girl's initial response was pleasing to Me and that is all that matters.

issue two. I need to think about screening her perv mail. I feel that this guy abused her. I dont need her having even one extra minute of frustration or negativity and this mail provided more than one minute for sure. If someone has a problem with My girl they need to take it up with Me, she is My responisiblity and how she acts is always an effort to please Me (not an effort to please a random D/). If mail is written from someone to her just to be pervy and abusive, then My girl doesnt need to be dealing with that either. I believe totally that My girl can handle these sorts of things and people but I also know that no part of Me wants her exposed to these sorts of things and people.

Just a few odds and ends. My girl is not a slave, she is My girl. she has been given permission to open fire on anyone that calls her slave. D/s is a relationship. not a fantasy or an evening in the dungeon with a stranger. Many many building blocks are required before power exchange is even considered, calling yourself dom and being abusive to strangers just aint gonna get it done. Lastly, just because My girl has submitted to Me doesnt mean she will implicitly be submissive to anyone claiming to be a dom/domme, thats just a silly conclusion to draw.

Decisions Decisions

2007-12-27T15:00:00.000-08:00

I want to talk a little bit about the decision making process in a lifestyle D/s relationship. This is how I see it at its most basic level.... The sub decides to submit and hand over power(i.e. power exchange) to the Dom, and the Dom has the power to decide everything else. I said power to decide because I can choose to hand over power of decision making on things and of course I can also choose not to decide at all.

But in the end I always retain the right to decide whatever I choose whenever I choose and however I choose. Does that mean I would ever decide something completely contrary to what is best for her or our well being? No never and if she thought that, she wouldnt have submitted to Me. I always listen to, value, and consider her opinion and often defer to it, but we both know that I am not obliged to do so. We also both know that she is obliged to obey Me if she wishes to please Me. she only suggests, while I , on the other hand, use the command form.

Obedience and submission all the time is all that I require. As you can see, D/s and more specifically Me and My girl are all about trust of which I work constantly to earn, tirelessly to keep, and fanatically to be worthy of.

Dom Hammer Arm Fatigue

2007-12-22T13:38:00.000-08:00

Over the past few days I have dropped the Dom Hammer on My girl a few times pretty hard (read her blog for all the juicy details). I want to explain what I think My rationale was for hammering My girl so hard (no, not in the good way). My girl is not a dishrag. she is a strong, competent, competitive person. I take great pride in this fact. It makes her submission to Me even more precious as I have told her many many times. The fact that she finds Me worthy of her submssion is a great source of pride for Me.

So here is the rub (again no, not in the good way), I think I feel the need to really really stay on top of My girl. My perception of her is tainted by her strength. Let Me say it like this... I know she is 100 percent devoted to her submission to Me but I also know when we met she was a switch, she has informed Me that she has gotten her domme on before there was Me,and as I said before, My girl is strong, competent and competitive. My girl also enjoys firing automatic weapons, and I think she even has henchmen! I dont cite these things to justify My over reacting but rather as reasoning for My perceptions.

What does this mean? it means I need to relax. I know her submission to Me is complete and true. I am reacting like My Dominance is getting challenged and tested when in fact, I know that is not the truth. If there is behavior I dont like or rules being broken, I need to look elsewhere for the answer to the "why" question. I need to reassure her and tell her that I know she is My girl and that I am never questioning her devotion or submission to Me.

Rules and Punishment

2007-12-20T20:09:00.000-08:00

Rules rules rules... As a Dom in a 24/7 D/s relationship, I consider rules to be absolutely vital. Rules act as a constant reminder of submission when followed. What I mean by this is that in a 24/7, following My rules is how we both are forced to think about her submission to Me. Rules prevent us both from slipping down the slippery vanilla slope. Rules also act as D/s pop quizzes. I am a big fan of testing My girls submission regularly, and obeying My rules without exception or error is the most basic of these tests. Rules modify behavior. I have things I like and things I find appealing. I know My girl wants to please Me and she should know the easiest and surest way to please Me is to simply follow My rules.
One more note on rules briefly. Some are directly sexual and some not so much. Examples.. no orgasm until given permission vs never walk in front of Me. Although the former seems completely sexual and the latter doesnt seem sexual at all, I consider them the same. All rules are about obedience and submission , thats the only context that matters to Me. I dont distinguish "types" of rules.

Punishment, punishment, punishment. What good are rules that arent followed or enforced? I know the worst punishment for My girl is the knowledge of My displeasure, so I am big on lectures and warnings. The voicing of My displeasure with the reinforcement of reasoning (or the threat of a belting when I am not in the mood to reason), is usually all the punishment needed for My girl. Sometimes I will belt as punishment. I do this for 2 reasons. 1. If I dont occasionally follow thru with a threat then the threat becomes meaningless and ineffective. and 2. Hyde kinda digs it.
If I feel the need to punish beyond what I have already stated then I want the punishment to be a lesson of sorts. I want her to learn from the punishment so that the infraction is not commited again.

My Jekyll and Hyde

2007-12-19T18:59:00.000-08:00

I admit to being a bit of a sadist.. how much is a bit? its a little more than this much and a little less than that much (I just moved My finger and thumb apart about a smidge just to give you a visual).

There is a part of Me, My Mr. Hyde, that enjoys inflicting pain, enjoys humiliating, wants to hear pleas for mercy. Hyde wants to be feared when he is displeased. Hyde cracks his belt to make his girl jump. Hyde likes to spank hard and doesnt stop until he hears those begs and pleas for Daddy to stop. Hyde likes to slap his girl, and call her his slut and his whore. Hyde likes to pull her long hair and always wants to lay "dom traps" just so he can be displeased. Hyde likes to fuck His girl hard until she is very very sore. Its the Hyde that never thinks he is strict enough. Its the Mr. Hyde that always wants to punish.

Then there is the good Doctor in Me. My Jekyll wants to soothe her pain, remove her worry, make her care-free. Jekyll wants to lift her up, let her know how strong and beautiful and smart He thinks she is. Jekyll loves to hear her laugh and relishes those sweet things she whispers in His ear. Jekyll never wants to be feared; he wants to be trusted, adored and loved. And its the Jekyll in Me that caresses her face and tells her how pretty her blue eyes are. Jekyll doesnt lay "dom traps" but rather He prefers tests, and takes great pride when His girl passes these tests. Jekyll likes to watch her in pleasure and loves to make her orgasm over and over. Its the Jekyll that thinks he is always being to strict and punishes to much.

I aknowledge a bit of a dichotomy within Me. but there is common ground! All of Me demands obedience and submission. And all of Me wants, needs and desires My girl.

Introduction

2007-12-15T16:29:00.000-08:00

Greetings, first a little about Myself and situation. I am the Dom part of a D/s couple. We are 24/7 power exchange. What I mean by that is there is no time that she is not My girl and I am not her Man. Her submission to Me never stops and it is tested regularly. She is a gift that I use often and cherish constantly. she is beautiful and often too smart for her own good. she is devoted to Me and her submission and strives to be always be pleasing to Me. Ok enough Dom gloating... at least for now.

Just a little about Me. I am straight, 37yo and very Dom. I consider Myself to be strict and yes I have a sadistic streak that manifests in different ways. I am also very loving and considerate and always have My girls best interests and well being in mind. I consder her happiness as well as mine as My responsibility. I want this journal to provide insight into how I view the world. I want it to be a "thru My eyes" read.

Why am I writing this? As part of My girls training I have instructed her to keep a journal. After reading her entries and finding them very pleasing for many reasons, I have decided that there would be value for My girl in keeping one Myself. Ok she submissively suggested it to Me also but forget I said that... it was ALL My idea!!